An Experiment

As I keep mentioning, the sleep thing is going really well so far… so well that I decided to mess with it a bit last night, all in the name of science, of course.

Our routine is to put the small one down between 7 and 8 PM, and he’s usually out until somewhere between 2 and 4 AM, when he wakes for his one middle of the night feeding/diaper change. Then he goes right back down until 7ish. Not bad at all for a ten week old. So that I make it through the night (and to stock up on back-up milk for when I go back to work), I usually pump around 10 PM, right before I go to bed.

Last night, after getting sucked into a DVD of Weeds (I had to finish the last two episodes on the disc so I could send it back, you know how it goes), I found myself about to go to bed at 11:30ish and thought, “what if I wake up the small one and feed and change him now instead of pumping? maybe he’ll make it through the night.” And what did I have to lose, really? There’s plenty of frozen milk in the freezer, and I only have two more weeks of maternity leave, so sleep experiments need to occur now while I can still nap off any disastrous results.

And so I woke him up… well, picked him up would be more accurate, as he proceeded to nurse while only about 50% awake. But he did nurse thoroughly and burped promptly upon being slung over my shoulder, so it was off to the changing table.

Here we ran into some problems. You see, maybe this is true for all babies, I really can’t say, but the small one doesn’t tend to have a bowel movement until he’s fully awake and fed. This is why I don’t usually change his diaper and then feed him, as I’ve tried this too many times only to have him poo while feeding, prompting another diaper change. Well, since the small one was awoken from his slumber vs. woke up naturally, it seems to have taken his digestive track a little longer to sort itself out, as the moment I’d replaced his diaper I heard the telltale sign of poop.

And so I took off the freshly soiled diaper, only to be met with explosive slimy green baby sludge aimed right at my hand. Awesome. I baby-wiped myself clean and put on a new diaper, only to feel a distinctly wet spot spreading as I fastened the snappi diaper clip. Oh well, third times the charm, right?

The answer is wrong. Yet again, upon opening what was now soiled diaper number three, my hand was met with another shot of projectile baby poo, this time of the more standard rice cereal consistency. Terrific. Now I was covered with poo, as was the changing table. And as I began to clean myself off, the small one preceded to pee all over himself.

At this point, the kid had to be completely empty, so I put on diaper number four, changed his outfit and placed the child on the bed just long enough for me to go wash my hands and replace the changing table cover. When I returned, the small one was wide awake, so I nursed him some more until he looked sleepy enough for me to put back in his crib, and he was out cold within two minutes.

Not exactly the smooth feed and change maneuver I was going for.

Oh yeah, and it was a complete failure, as the small one was still up at 4 AM for his middle of the night top up. And now I’m going to take a much needed nap…

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